14 August 2013

Misogyny, my ass.

Disclaimer: This is going to be a long, angry post. You have been warned. Stay off this page if you're unable to accept that people are allowed to have different opinions to yours.

Misogyny.

Defined as hatred or dislike of women or girls.

Trust people to freak the fuck out of this song. Apparently it's disgusting and full of misogyny.

Dude.

Newsflash: I have nothing against people who don't cover themselves up. Especially if they're not Muslims. Because covering yourself up FOR A MUSLIM, while remains as a must, is also something a girl must do with her own conviction. Otherwise that fiery passion will crumble halfway. I do try to nudge people along, because I love and care for them, but in the end they have to decide they want to do it, for themselves.

I also don't judge them, because I have no freakin idea of their internal monologue, their inner thoughts. They have been educated by their parents and molded by their environment, which makes them who they are. This is where husnu 'dzon comes into the picture. Always seeing people in their best light. Don't think negatively of them.

How does someone admonishing you for overexposure translates to insecurity and reflects their need for control? Maybe it's a liberal and open-minded thing to expose all you want according to how you want to, but there's a level of modesty and dignity and social cues that people should take heed of. You're not the only person living in this world. Men get all heated up and lusty seeing the boobies. Girls huff about blaming the men for the hormones, declaring that men shouldn't look at them with those naughty eyes.

DUDE. YOU ARE TEMPTING THEM. That's why they are watching. That's why porn exist. They don't have the same anatomical familiarity, of course they're going to stare. It's the same way how pervy fangirls fan themselves and declare proudly that their panties are wet or [insert variations of this sentence] whenever the men do sinful hiprolls, wear super fucking tight pants that reveals all the bulges and the bubble peaches.

It's the law of attraction. Why are men misogynist and women oppressed when men want someone they treasure and love to be exclusive to themselves, but when women ogle over the men then it's okay? Fucking hypocrites. Don't even lie, girls are even better when it comes to giving the once-over covertly. Men are obvious. Their eyes go up and down. Women are experts at checking out people. Excellent 360-degree vision field. I can say this because I know I do it. (And I'm not proud of it, and I do try to control myself.)

Let me break this down according to MY RELIGIOUS VIEWS.

My religion wants the men and the women to lower their eyes. Women to cover up so that men understands that these XXs are to be treated with respect. Both parties are to be responsible. Their bodies are exclusive. Only special and selected ones are gifted with these exclusive privileges.

The message my religion wants to convey?

You're special.

You're precious.

You are your own master.

Either people welcome it or they push it away, or maybe interpret it the way they want to (thus the need for a good teacher to help along the way maybe).

This is why I don't watch MVs. This is why I don't watch variety shows (much). This is why I don't watch music broadcasts. These groups of men and women sing about love, sex, breakups, society and whatever that rocks their boats and sells its visual with sexual innuendos. Always.

I don't judge people who watch them, I just prefer to ignore them- the materials, I mean. Not the people.

Now let's talk about ~misogyny~, as per how I see it as, according to my bringing up, and my religious belief.

Ever had that annoying little brother who always tell you you're wearing too little? I do. My brother is even more particular about my clothes, because I am a potential blackhole for them; my actions can bring the men in my house either closer or farther from Hell's Door later in the Afterlife. I remember being scolded BY MY BROTHER about my clothes a few years ago. Not in the mean way, even. Just a simple "Your clothes are too much of a see-through". I was annoyed. My clothes, my body. Now that I'm older (and hopefully wiser), I understand that my body is my responsibility, and that means my spot in Heaven is all on me. My brother is being a GOOD brother for telling me.

Which is weird because I can turn a blind eye everytime my mom nags me about how my pants is too tight or my veil doesn't fully cover my chest. Sure, I'd feel bad, but my fashion is my fashion. I guess it's genetically wired into us to oppose our parents.

Again, now that I'm older, I'm even much more conservative as to how I dress at home (yeah feel free to gasp and let your jaw drop or something) because what I wear is going to be what my brothers see. I have three brothers. They're all at various stages of puberty. I know they know about sex. I know they know about porn. I know they imagine and fantasize about womanly curves. I'd rather my body stays mine, even if we're family. All it takes are mental images.

(I'm not as particular with my girlfriends though. We all have the same thing anyway. I do observe the religious limitations between women, however.)

In the end, I don't even know what I want people to understand. Covering up doesn't mean you're traditional and boring and geeky and insecure. Asking your loved ones to cover up is not a sign that you hate women and their awesome blossoming physicality, nor does it makes you a possessive asshole who wants us women to be forever oppressed.

Islam encourages females to be leaders, to make movements in the bigger scope of life. We even get to do it without resorting to manipulate men's fatal weakness for our bodies, again, the purpose of covering up. Not saying that men are horny 24/7 though. I want men to acknowledge me for my awesome abilities to live life with dignity. I want them to look at my eyes, not to my boobs. I don't want to give my body in exchange for respect and attention.

That to say, I have no problem with people who thinks of their exposure as a weapon, or as a privilege. Feel free to flash your body or dress the way you want to. It doesn't diminish my respect for you, because I understand that we are different. Husnu 'dzon, they say.

Like I said, my life is not just bounded by what I want. My life is a gift, and an investment. My life doesn't stop the moment I drop dead and my body gets stuffed six feet under. My life right now will continue later in the Afterlife, and what I do right now will determine how I spend the rest of my Afterlife.

I don't know if anyone is going to read this, but PLAY NICE. This is my opinion after all. Feel free to flame me, but I like stimulating conversation (I'll be pissed, but I'll be mature about it). Don't worry, I'm really, really good when it comes to agreeing to disagree. Wonder why people can't extend the same courtesy to me.

And yes, my opinion is largely based on my religious belief. Don't question that. You can ask me to elaborate though. I didn't spend 5 years studying extra religious subjects in High School just to bend my opinions for those who doesn't see my religion the way I do. And I do admit that I'm not the best Muslim, or even a decent one, but I know I'm trying to be better.

Trust Kpop to make me come out of my shell. Now I'm wondering how South Korean's Confucian roots view their females as. Then again, a large portion of SK don't particularly brand themselves as a member of organized religion anymore, so it might be a moot point.

PS: Ignore grammatical errors, or feel free to point it out if you're anal about it the way I do. It's 1AM and I'm supposed to be studying for Paediatric exams tomorrow... oh wait it's today.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You are awesome and keep being awesome. Good luck for your exams!